reflecting on primary heartbreak and it's persistent reverberations. first love is one of two people depending on gender and sometimes they die or leave or ignore or misunderstand or screw up or have differing priorities and desires. second heartbreak is one of two people depending on gender and sometimes ditto. the numbers can vary as can the genders but watch it not matter. everyone henceforth is one or the other or not of interest. what happens if you only have the one? or half a one? or have two for half the time and then only one? or more than two? watch it not matter. heartbreak.

which is the best metaphor for that sneaking up behind and tapping on the shoulder and the shocked look of recognition: rings in water, spiral arms, feedback loop, plenty others. funny to realize the one sneaking up and tapping is the one looking shocked, the one with the shoulder, the one with whiplash from double-taking.

sorry, but that doppleganger is you, silly. DUH. DUH. sorry.