The kids call me Miss Lindsey +2 (the shine of this has worn off some since this is now the second job that this title has been bestowed upon me)
It is totally acceptable to plan lessons around things like: bubbles, color, books by Roald Dahl or making guitars out of shoeboxes +10
I now know the Spongebob Squarepants theme song by heart +1?
Work starts at 3:15 pm + 5
V____ W____ + 5 -2 = 3 (Kid's probably a genius, definitely hilarious and seriously trying my patience)
The first thing V.W. said to me was, "Miss Lindsey, if you had one army what would you do with it?"
Harsh realization that it takes more than cajoling sarcasm and stern looks to earn the respect of 4th-graders -0-
The process by which I learned the above -5 (losing control of fifteen nine year olds sucks)
Work is a ten minute walk from the Ocean +10
Stickers go a long way +2
Salem Peterson +10
A second-grader patted me on both cheeks, giggled and ran away today during recess + 3
Defining the words: blister and hankering +5 (Thank you Roald Dahl)