O Tannenbaum

O Tannenbaum, O Tannenbaum
Heffeiweisen weisenheimer;
O Tannenbaum! O Tannenbaum!
bratwurst, nachwurst, Franziskaner;
weiner schnizel eiderdown,
gezundheit schlep unt edelweiss.
O Tannenbaum! O Tannenbaum!
Ubermensch schnoz doppleganger

O Tannenbaum! O Tannenbaum!
Mutter vater raus mit zu;
O Tannenbaum! O Tannenbaum!
zeitgeist Freud Kant Hegel Kline;
Heidegger Herzog Fassbinder
Ich bin ein berliner Alexanderplatz
O Tannenbaum! O Tannenbaum!
elbonin Reichstag Luftwaffe.

O Tannenbaum! O Tannenbaum!
schlep Kraftwerk Autobon Oktoberfest!
O Tannenbaum! O Tannenbaum!
Boldt Orth Kraut Sausage Weimaramer
Hindenburgh Fritz schwartz milche Todes Fugue
Nietzche dirndl Wittgenstein
O Tannenbaum! O Tannenbaum!
Wagner gesamtkunstwerk lederhosen

The Happier We'll Be

and my friends are cobras and your friends are airplanes / and my friends are sitcoms and your friends are romcoms / and my friends are digital and your friends are analog / and my friends are wicca and your friends are dragons / and my friends are civil-servants and your friends are cultural-workers / and my friends are women and your friends are gypsies /and

Happy Together

Your friends are my friends / and my friends are your friends / the more we get together the happier we'll be / and my friends are animals and your friends are junkies / and my friends are aestheticians and your friends are beavers / and your friends are dentists and my friends are othodontists / and my friends are dill-holes and your friends are jagoffs / and my friends are sketchy and your friends are out-sourced / and my friends are exotic and your friends are whimsical and

Just in case

you missed the flarf poem that arrived in my comment box a while back, here it is for your enjoyment. For the record, I have never owned a pair of Ugg Boots and were I to be caught dead in them, I can assure you that they would have had to have been crammed onto my rigor mortified feet posthumously as some kind of sick "fuck you" to me and my sense of decency. They're not cute, gals, they just aren't. They make you look like a rhino.


No, no, a thousand times no!

Flarf Poem:

hxr said...
ugg
ugg boots
Fashion Ugg boots
Classic Ugg Boots
wholesale Ugg Boots
ugg sandals
cheap ugg shoes
Bailey Button UGG Boots
Ugg Bailey Button
Classic Cardy Ugg Boots
Ugg Classic Cardy
Classic Mini Ugg Boots
Mini Ugg Boots
Classic Short Ugg Boots
Ugg Classic Short
Classic Tall Ugg Boots
Ugg Classic Tall
Infant Erin Ugg Boots
Baby Ugg Boots
Nightfall Ugg Boots
Ugg Nightfall
Short Metallic Ugg Boots
Sundance II Ugg Boots
Sundance 2 Ugg Boots
Tall Metallic Ugg Boots
UGG Amelie Suede Sandals
Amelie Suede Sandals Ugg Boots
UGG Fluff Flip Flop
UGG Tasmina Braid Sandals
Tasmina Braid Sandals Ugg Boots
UGG Tasmina Sandals
Tasmina Sandals Ugg Boots
Ultra Short Ugg Boots
Ultra Tall Ugg Boots


p.s. Anyone see the season finale of Project Runway Season 6? One of the designers actually wore some dang ugg boots with a dress to present her collection at fashion week. Straight up. How does that happen?

PRB Reading Report by Mr. Apps

Super thoughtful reading report of my reading with John Sakkis at The Poetic Research Bureau in L.A. by Stan Apps. Thank you, Stan!

Mwa

Axl Rose sounds just like a Skexis on "Welcome to the Jungle". Don't tell me you never noticed.

MWA! WwwaA!
Mmmm, Gelfling. Welcome to the jungle!
Your're gonna DIIIE!

Don't take my word for it:



*I was going to have a clip of "Welcome to the Jungle" here from Imeem but apparently Myspace just bought them out so we won't be having any more of that free music nonsense. Boo.

S.F. --> L.A. Road Poem

by me and my boys (Steve Orth and John Sakkis) unawares








Pubes are a present
pubes are a privilage
suspicion is your game (your honesty's to blame)
Viper Room
I'll have a French Racetrack
horse tranqs & red wine
Remember guys, 2 rootbeers each, that's it
East Bay extends to Livermore
Benicia, Vallejo, that's North Bay
stoked, super stoked
get some headshots
book a commercial, work on getting a SAG card
the jukebox affect--playing music you know
Where the fuck are we?
I can't imagine living there
Can you imagine living there?
I can't imagine living there
but these fucking hills are beautiful
This is the Altamont pass
Power pop (Cheaptrick)
Are you equating [redacted] people from Oakland
w/ Uruk-Hai?
That's what that girl said right before we [redacted]
write that shit down
pub cheese--it's pretty fuckin' sweet
yer gonna love it
Rotten Robbie

Cowsies!
Cowsies!
Giant clouds!
Sky....
Yosemite! Yosemite! Yosemite!
Nat'l Park!

I got a jug a dat
"No water, no jobs"
La Pinocha--pussy sweet bread
work that clit

Heart full of love for you
brothers
kissing cousins
my ambiguous and multiple thought--all at once
all at once
low flying clouds
rocking the hills
like twilight zone
turn to smog
the atmosphere--flattens
we're winding through
workable line
it deals w/ you
I can see the sauce
I want the sauce
all down my mouth/chin
like a guzzler
the shock of persimmon in everyday life
winding up w/ a mouthful
when you thought you were just eating fruit

Heck yeah, the lights
neighboring neighborhoods
Is Glendale a neighborhood or a city in L.A.?
Ok, we don't have to listen to The Doors
the whole time but it has to stay L.A.
Guns n' Roses, Beck
OK
Totally
Is Bon Jove L.A.?
No, that's New Jersey